March 24, 2025

WHITE LOTUS – Season 3, Episode 6 – Brojobs, Buddhism & Sunscreen Shame

Okay, so I just finished this week’s White Lotus, Episode 6 and honestly? My brain is doing the “buffering” symbol. Like, did we just watch a soap opera, a thriller, or a really intense therapy session? Because it felt like all three. And, you know, with a side of really expensive resort decor.

Saxon & Lochlan: Sunscreen Won’t Wash Away That Shame

The episode opens with Saxon waking up to a bootyful view—Lochlan, completely nude beside him, after last night’s disastrous Full Moon Party. Lochlan might still be unconscious (lucky him), but Saxon’s face reads pure horror. The infamous “brojob” happened, and nothing could’ve prepared us (or Saxon) for this moment. Saxon spends the entire day compulsively spraying sunscreen on himself, as if Coppertone SPF-100 can erase his sins. Spoiler alert: it won’t.

Meanwhile, Lochlan conveniently remembers nothing—until mid-meditation at Piper’s monastery stay, when the memories flood back, prompting a look of total panic that screams, “What—and I cannot stress this enough—the actual fck?! Talk about a spiritual awakening gone wrong.

Timothy Ratliff: Daydreaming About Death (Yikes)

Then there’s Tim. Poor Tim. Tim is seriously unraveling. He’s a man who’s never had to face real consequences, and the idea of losing everything – his wealth, his status, his carefully constructed life – is unbearable. He’s obsessively daydreaming about suicide, imagining scenarios where his family finds him after he’s gone—because nothing says “relaxing vacation” like dark intrusive thoughts, right? Hoping for clarity, he visits the monastery, but instead of peace, the monk casually mentions that death is “like a wave returning to the ocean,” unintentionally pushing Tim closer to the edge.

Later, Victoria helpfully chimes in with, “I couldn’t live if we lost everything,” right as Saxon strolls past and gunshots ring ominously in the background. Subtle, Mike White. Very subtle.

Victoria Ratliff: Needs a Map, STAT

Victoria, bless her heart, is still hilariously clueless. When Piper expresses interest in staying at the monastery, Victoria panics, blurting out, ‘He better be the best Buddhist in China!’ Seriously, someone get her a map. She’s picturing Piper roughing it in a place that’s clearly not up to her standards, like it’s a budget hostel with extra chanting. Then, in a classic Victoria move, she accidentally ends up giving herself a tour of the monastery, doing a quick “livability assessment.” She’s thinking, “If I wouldn’t last a night here, Piper definitely won’t.” She’s so out of touch with the spiritual aspect, she’s basically judging the place based on its plumbing and decor like she’s on House Hunters: Monastic Edition. It’s like, she’s so sure Piper will be miserable, she accidentally becomes the expert on the monastery’s architecture. She’s completely unaware of how funny she’s being, and how she’s missing the entire point. Love her!

Piper Ratliff: Zen Master in Training

Meanwhile, Piper is fully embracing this whole “find myself in a monastery” vibe. She agreed to Victoria’s idea of spending one night to see if she survives, and honestly, at this point, surviving monks sounds way easier than surviving another Ratliff family dinner. She sits serenely in meditation, blissfully unaware her brother Lochlan is having a full-on existential breakdown beside her. This monastery stay might actually be the most emotionally stable thing anyone has done all season.

Rick & Frank: Still in Bangkok, Still Messy

Rick is still in Bangkok, trying to rope Frank into his increasingly sketchy revenge plot. Frank casually agrees to pretend he’s a big-shot movie director (because sure, why not?), helping Rick get close to Jim Hollinger. Meanwhile, Chelsea’s having a full-on astrology panic attack, which, honestly, I get. She’s not just worried about Rick; she’s feeling some seriously bad vibes, especially since she knows “bad luck comes in three’s.” She’s basically trying to tell him that the stars are screaming ‘danger,’ and that he’s currently two bad things deep. She’s like, “Rick, this is your cosmic warning, and you’re about to hit strike three,” but he’s just like, “nah, I got this.”

(And, by the way, I still can’t get over the cinematography in this show. Its mind blowing.)

Belinda & Pornchai: Dangerously Perfect Offers

And Belinda? Girl, seriously, run. Like, sprint. Pornchai’s “too good to be true” spa offer is flashing so many red flags, it’s practically a communist parade. He’s suddenly all “I believe in your dreams!” and “Let me fund your entire future!” which, in the White Lotus universe, translates to: I have a shady motive and you’re about to get caught in it. Remember how those usually end? Someone ends up… well, let’s just say “taking a permanent vacation” like Tanya. It’s like, Belinda, you’re smarter than this! Don’t let a charming fruit vendor with a suspiciously large bank account lead you down the same path. You deserve better than to be someone’s investment opportunity with a side of potential danger.

And Enter Zion (king), politely interrupting a private moment to ask if she needs a minute, then choosing waffles over hotel fruit. Honestly? His grounded energy is what everyone on this show needs..

Jaclyn, Laurie & Kate: See No Evil, Hear No Evil, Speak No Evil

The toxic trio is still deep in their passive-aggressive spiral, putting on the fakest smiles you’ve ever seen. Things finally hit the fan this episode, perfectly illustrating the classic “see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil” setup. Laurie (hear no evil) is clearly fuming over Jaclyn’s hookup with Valentin, but pretends not to notice the gossip swirling around her. Jaclyn (see no evil) desperately tries to look unbothered, cracking open Barbra Streisand’s memoir poolside in the most hilariously obvious act of denial ever. And Kate (speak no evil), the ultimate two-faced pot-stirrer, is the kind of friend who’ll call your dress “brave” and then trash it the second you walk away. It’s the perfect storm of fake friendship energy.

Chloe: Queen of Creepy Nonchalance

Chloe’s reaction to the Saxon-Lochlan incident? She shrugs it off like someone asking if housekeeping came yet. When she says to Saxon, “Make sure you bring your brother,” I can’t tell if she’s deliberately messing with him… or just deeply detached from reality. Possibly both.

There’s something so eerie about her mix of calm, curiosity, and zero emotional response—like she might genuinely watch a building burn down and ask, “Is this performance art?” You almost want to shake her and ask, “Are you even human?” But she’d probably just tilt her head and whisper, “Wanna see a magic trick?”

Chelsea & Saxon: Spiritual Connections and Soulless Encounters

Saxon, completely lost when it comes to emotional depth, asks Chelsea why she won’t hook up with him. He truly can’t compute that someone might value more than just a physical connection. Chelsea, in full spiritual guru mode, shuts him down: “Once you’ve connected on a spiritual level, cheap sex just feels empty.” Saxon blinks, “How would you know that?”

She doesn’t miss a beat: “Because you’re soulless. Sad.”

The look on his face? Like someone just told him Red Bull doesn’t actually give you wings.

Gaitok & Mook: Security Issues and Shooting Lessons

Gaitok, still reeling from the gun’s disappearance in episode 5, manages to retrieve it in this episode, though his relief is short-lived. Later, we see him at the shooting range, nervously trying to prove he can handle something in this job. Mook swings by looking very into it—or very into him, we’re not sure yet. Either way, he’s upgraded from “liability” to “work in progress.”

Lochlan’s Decision: The Duke of Denial

In a subtle moment that most of us missed (because we were too distracted by incest and monastic breakdowns), Lochlan chooses to go to Duke—his father and brother’s alma mater—over UNC. It’s a quiet nod that he’s aligning himself with the Ratliff men. Whether that’s a good idea? TBD.

Bonus Shoutout: The Score Is the Unsung Star

Quick moment of appreciation for the music this week—because Cristobal Tapia de Veer’s score? Absolutely unhinged in the best way. One minute it’s giving music-box nightmare, the next it’s bass-heavy that makes your stomach turn, and sometimes it’s just the theme song on steroids. It doesn’t sit quietly in the background; It adds to the dread, the drama, and all the weirdness in between. Like everything else in White Lotus, it’s not accidental—it’s a whole mood.

Honorable Mention: Denials, Denials Everywhere!

This episode wasn’t called “Denials” for nothing. Quick recap of all the lying (to others, themselves, or both):

Tim denies himself the sweet release of suicide (yikes, Tim).
Lochlan denies remembering anything from last night (possibly true).
Rick denies going out to have any fun in Bangkok (sadly true).
Jaclyn denies hooking up with Valentin (nice try, Jaclyn).
Laurie denies caring about Jaclyn hooking up with Valentin (girl, please).
Rick swears he doesn’t actually want to kill Jim Hollinger (sure, Rick).
Chloe tells Greg/Gary she definitely didn’t cheat on him (uh-huh).
Saxon denies remembering the brojob incident (also possibly true).
Kate insists she and Laurie weren’t shit-talking Jaclyn (definitely false).
Saxon can’t even make eye contact with Lochlan or say goodbye (we see you, Saxon).
Belinda denies Greg/Gary’s dinner invite (smartest choice all episode).
Gaitok says the gun wasn’t stolen (technically true…now).

This crew isn’t just vacationing in Thailand—they’re vacationing in denial.

Final Thoughts: Brace for Impact (and Greg’s Sketchy Party)

As we head into next week’s episode, everything feels like it’s teetering on the edge. We’ve got three guns, a shady party coming up, and a whole lot of emotional baggage. It’s like a powder keg waiting to explode. As Chelsea ominously reminded us, “bad luck comes in threes.”

And let’s not forget: Gary/Greg is throwing this party next week—and he’s already hinted he needs Chloe’s “help” with something shady. Considering he clearly knows she hooked up with one of the Ratliff brothers, this feels less like a social event and more like a setup.

Greg/Gary’s charm? Total red flag. His sudden “generosity” toward Belinda feels like a trap, and his interest in Chloe is straight-up sketchy. He’s playing a dangerous game, and I’m fully convinced he’s the puppet master quietly pulling all the strings. Agree?

Lastly, can we talk about the opening credits? They’re not just pretty wallpapers. The animals, the patterns, the shifting music—it’s all part of the story. The crocodile? It’s growing. Did anyone else notice how Sam Rockwell’s name is basically hovering right above that giant crocodile? I mean, come on, that’s not a coincidence. It’s like the show is telling us he’s connected to this predatory force, this danger lurking beneath the surface of paradise. And given how Rick’s revenge plot is shaping up, that crocodile feels less like a random animal and more like a symbol of something… ominous. Seriously, Mike White is playing some serious mind games with these visuals. The dark, murky colors, the lush but dangerous setting – it’s all adding to this sense of unease. It’s like we’re watching a beautiful painting slowly turn into a horror movie. And with Sam Rockwell’s character involved in Rick’s revenge scheme, I’m starting to think that crocodile is going to play a much larger role than just being a pretty picture. Anyone else getting that vibe?

Bring on the waffles, Zion—we’ll need comfort food once all three guns (and Greg’s party) inevitably blow up in everyone’s face.

That’s a wrap!!
Until next week!!
XX

Thoughts?