50 Shades of Vomit
Worst day in the calendar year – Valentine’s Day. Why it exists is beyond me (is it an actual “holiday”?) The pressure to give a gift, send flowers, chocolate or whatever your love desires is plain ridic. I appreciate the flowers and the gifts when they are least expected, not when there is a specific day in the calendar that determines when you should show your bae your unrequited love.
In order to really go balls to the wall, I am going to have to reread Fifty Shades on the 14th because there is not shot in hell I am going to see the 50 Shades of Vomit. #worstcastever.
With that being said, here are a few “love”gifts if you are so inclined:
Neiman’s is already sold out of them! You can buy them here $765
Chocolate? There is only one go to person for the most beautiful, exquisite, handcrafted couture chocolate!
Maggie Louise Confections $48 per gift box
If you are a macaron fan, you MUST go to Asalt & Buttery in Little Falls. Amazeballs! They also deliver nationwide!
Their champagne gift set is made up of all their scrumptious flavors including Champagne, Rose, Chocolate Pomegranate, Dark Chocolate Sea Salt, Raspberry,Vanilla, Salted Caramel, PB & J, Red Velvet, and Hazelnut Nutella (10 macarons) $20.25!
For the lover of cookies…Eleni’s has introduced a 50 Shades of Vomit I mean Grey cookie edition:
Gift box $50.
His & Hers undies? Kind of hot on VDAY!
Couples that workout together stay together?
Bari is offering a couples bounce class! Bounce, sweat and enjoy chocolates and champagne after class!
The perfect gift for everyone who loves a timeless red lip. Beautycounter’s Valentine’s Day Gift Set introduces Scarlet, their latest Lip Sheer in a universally flattering shade of true red, plus includes their subtly sweet Lip Shine and six exclusive note cards from Sugar Paper, Los Angeles makers of luxurious letterpress stationery.
Gift Set $75
Jewelry makes every girl happy as long as you know what to pick out! You can hardly ever go wrong with Hermes. This bracelet is not limited to only red but in light of VDAY I thought it was apropros.
Hermes $650
What would a Valentine’s Day Gift Guide be without Van Cleef. The box itself would send any woman into orgasmic state.
Sweet Alhambra Heart mini bracelet $1450.
Sweet Alhambra Clover mini earstuds $2500.
Vintage Alhambra necklace $17,500. (for those who have extra funds on a rainy day)
MGEMS has the most beautiful, fun bracelets. I can’t stop buying them!!! This is one of my faves! The Druzy stack with Labradorite stone.
MGEMS $225
Hugs and Kisses year around? Wear them!
Elle Squared $575 (with diamonds), $275 (without)
Love these little heart dishes! Great for candy, rings, condoms, whatever!
The Tempting Table $27. Comes with spoon.
Latte Lover’s unite!
Crate & Barrel $ 6.95
Artwork is always a touching gift especially when it shows your “LOVE”. I love all of Oliver Gal’s canvas prints but here are a few of my faves for Valentine’s Day.
Prints range from $119-$945
Happy Vomit Day! Hope you all get laid! Unless of course this is your obligatory F@#k Day and in that case maybe you need to reconsider a new Valentine.
xx
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