The Affair Season 3 Episode 5 – Let’s Discuss!!

Can this show stay out east forever? After three long years, Noah has found his way back to Alison. Let’s discuss.


Welcome Back, Kotter.

Welcome Back, Noah. Welcome Back.
Only 4 days after Noah’s painful stabbing, he drives 3 hours from New Jersey to visit Alison.  She just cannot get a break. Alison unhappily utters to Noah to meet her at 66 South Emden Road in 15 minutes. Wow, an actual road on the AFFAIR that exists in Montauk.




Back at Alison’s home, she begins to explain to that Noah she can’t be seen with him because of the Joanie custody situation. However, that ends very quickly because Noah passes out on her couch in under 5 minutes.  That Vicodin must be some powerful shit. I have no idea how he drove to Montauk in the first place. Somehow Alison moves Noah into Joanie’s bed and finds him with his magic pills in hand. She questions Noah about his Vicodin use and makes it a point to tell him he must be O.U.T in the am.

Noah misses that memo and wakes up early to whip up a nice breakfast. Is he kidding? Nice effort.  Noah pushes the envelope further and suggests they go to Block Island for the day. Like re-live their first rendezvous?  Alison is not going anywhere with him except to divorce court. It would not be a soap opera without Cole showing up at 9am to discuss the previous evening’s extracurricular activity.  It’s pretty funny watching Alison shove Noah out the back door as Cole knocks on the front door (smart she hid that 2nd coffee cup). Cole plays the” this never happened, what were we thinking” card and Alison is 100% down and fine with that (right ….until next week). But Alison suggests Cole tell the judge she is more than fit to be Joanie’s mom. Cole is like ummm.. well.. Alison tackles this with the perfect comeback: “I’m healthy enough to f*ck, but not to be the mother of our child.” Exactly Alison. BYE COLE.

Noah comes back in the kitchen and tells Alison he WILL sign the divorce papers IF she spends the day with him in Block Island. I mean can’t it just be easy? Why does everything need to be so hard? Can anything really change in ONE day?  Alison has no choice but to go. Alison does warn him ” I am not going to sleep with you Noah.” (I was sure hoping she wouldn’t).  So Alison & Noah hop on a ferry to Block Island with ZERO people on it. I know it is after Labor Day BUT people visit and live there in the off-season! Noah is in a jolly mood singing Camelot as if he was Leonardo DiCaprio. Alison is not amused.

I began writing about this show Season 1 Episode 5 which was the episode AFTER they consummated their Affair on Block Island. I really wish I had started that week on the blog but all my notes prior were on Facebook and it would take me 30 years to dig back that far. But what I can tell you is this…. The store, The Dirty Squid, Alison noticed was  “Going out of Business”


is the same store Alison & Noah got busy in the dressing room when their Affair began oh so long ago…



Alison & Cole have a small talk on the beach about Alison’s future in Montauk. Noah is bewildered that she is going to stay around Cole & and Luisa while raising Joanie. Noah believes Cole will always consider Alison damaged goods. Ha, if he only knew what happened 24 hours ago.


As Alison & Noah are walking around a deserted Block Island, Noah comes across a home that just so happens to have a running hot tub, a stocked wine fridge and wine glasses. Apparently Alison has some effect on Noah because he is naked, singing and jumping in a strange person’s  jacuzzi in under 3 seconds.


He persuades Alison to join him. I do admire the balls on her, I would have been scared to death that the owners were returning any minute. Seriously,  nobody leaves a hot tub running when they pack up for the season. I don’t care how wealthy you are. Maybe you leave it on for a few weeks, a month but not a season.
There were some very important words shared in this scene. I believe Alison’s six month stay at the “Rehabilitation Institute” helped her realize how they ended up having an affair in the first place:
“You know, you fell for me because you were bored and you felt trapped by Helen, your kids, your f*cking father-in-law. And you wanted a fling, but you chose me, who had lost a child, and who was so incredibly sad you couldn’t just abandon me, so you convinced yourself that you loved me. And I convinced myself that I loved you, because I so desperately needed someone just to take me away. I used you. You used me too. That’s what happened between us.”

This scene, by far, was my favorite scene in the entire episode because it was the first time, in the history of The Affair, Alison & Noah are truly raw, open and honest. They are both much softer and gentler then when they were actually together. I do think Alison used Noah and Noah used Alison but there is a tiny part of me that believes it was more than just a way out for both of them. Right?

As expected, the home owners come home and chase Noah and Alison out of there. They run naked like a bat out of hell. Alison leaves her shoes and wouldn’t you know it, the ferry leaves the second they arrive.



Stranded on Block Island, they find a bed & breakfast that allows them to stay for the night even though they closed for the season. Fact: B&B’s on Block Island are still open even in December! There are tons of them. The island doesn’t shut down once the summer is over. 1661 is OPEN.

They warm up in Block Island sweatshirts and have a heart to heart about what it means to be a mother. As Noah says to Alison “Look, you don’t have to be the greatest mother on Earth.  All you need to do for Joanie is be there.”  Absolutely and this is why I consider maybe Noah did learn a thing or two while he was away.
Even in this very vulnerable moment, I prayed they would not take those gd damn ugly sweatshirts off. But lo and be hold….



I was so happy we did not have to re-live the same scenes and we could start where Alison’s POV ended. Noah is in flashback land dreaming about jail. Psycho Gunther is distracting Noah from listening to Alison explain why she has to cut him off. Gunther claims he has no idea why Noah is serving time. Seems odd that he wouldn’t know that after two years, right? Gunther hijacks Noah’s only manuscript and Noah almost loses it. He wakes up next to Alison and hears a noise. Noah is seriously going off the rails. He sees Gunther outside in the parking lot (where there is not an entire soul on the whole island) at 2:30am. Alison finds Noah outside and questions what he could possibly doing outside in the middle of the night.


They have a 2am fireside chat about his father’s death and Alison’s missing father. Noah admits to feeding his mother a lethal dose of medication to free Noah so he can accept his college scholarship. Do you think Nina really did it and that is why his father left the house to Noah instead of Nina? Noah also acknowledges why he still loves Alison so much . He tells Alison “I kept asking myself, “What is it about her…” about you… the wrong person at the wrong time? Why did I just blow up my whole life for a girl I met at a diner? Why do I still love you so much?” And I never could find the answer. But… but you were sitting there talking about Gabriel, and I realized… You’re the only person I’ve ever met… The only other person I’ve met who… Who watched someone they love die.” The tears come and Alison consoles Noah. But it needed to end there.



Alison should have just let Noah lose her forever. But she is too weak. Did she not just have sex with Cole 24 hours ago?? Do we think they are using some sort of protection or Alison is going to become pregnant AGAIN? PLEASE NO.
Who sleeps like this?



It’s nice for five minutes but the bed in B&B is no bigger then a double bed. Plus I would love to know ONE person who is comfortable sleeping intertwined like that…



Noah is having a flashback again about Gunther and his psychotic behavior. Gunther has reached a whole new level of sickness when he throws a picture of Alison he ejaculated on at Noah. That was the icing on the cake for me. VILE. Noah goes insane (as any liked minded person would). I am beginning to think this Gunther dude is an entirely made up character in Noah’s book. Like Noah’s imaginary crazy guard in jail who happens to have known Noah when they were young. It seems ludicrous that 5 seconds after Noah forces himself at Gunther through the bars, all the correctional officers are suited and ready to charge into Noah’s cell.



Alison & Noah head back to Montauk and Noah signs the divorce papers. It’s official. Noah heads home but he doesn’t make it far. Out of the clear blue sky, Noah sees Gunther driving behind him and rear ends him. HOWEVER, in the last scene when they zoomed out, did you notice there was no rear bumper damage on Juliette’s car? ZERO. Noah is clearly suffering from PTSD and his opiate addiction is causing delirium. I think it’s time to believe he stabbed himself. Agree?

That’s a wrap!!! THOUGHTS??




Share Your Thoughts

  1. Cindy

    Yep. Noah’s lost his marbles.

    Does anyone really get as much action as Noah and Allison? Jeez. Sleeping with the ex, almost-sleeping with the professor before totaling the car the university has loaned her … and while we’re on that subject, who loans a car they don’t even own to a convicted felon (Juliette obviously doesn’t know Noah’s innocent of that crime) for who knows how many days?

    I was SO DISAPPOINTED in Allison for letting Noah manipulate her. He is a master manipulator — that’s why he suggested the day on Block Island before signing the papers. He knew all along what he wanted to do there. UGH! I can’t stand him.

    LOL I had the same thought … is Allison going to get pregnant again and not know again whether it’s Cole’s or Noah’s? And OMG what a situation that would be for Luisa. I’m guessing she’d leave Cole.

    January 4, 2017 • 5:54 pm •