Week 3. Sorry for bailing last week, I had to get the Holiday Gift Guide out and it took way longer then expected. I also apologize for being late to the game this week. I have had 2 sick kids home for days. Anyway a few notes about last week
- psyched Vic is back but screwing in the basement before the kids leave for school was a little ridic. I am unsure what 40+ year-old man would take that deal.
- So now Helen is a realtor and a con artist
- Whitney’s new boyfriend, aka as FURKAT, is one old and interesting dude (she loves older men that Whitney!)
- Loved the HUGE vagina photograph placed carefully between Helen and Vic on that stressful ride home
- Alison’s side was utterly boring. I’m glad Cole gave in and allowed Alison to see Joanie.
- Curious to know what happens to Vic and his cactus Rex in future episodes.
Lo and be hold we have a new perspective. Bonjour Juliette – Welcome to The Affair. Welcome to the club of women who masturbate to Noah Solloway. Let’s see your side of the story from last week.
Well, we are certainly handed her POV and then some! Juliette takes on the role of the medieval professor deciphering text, looking for clues. At lunchtime, Juliette is reading a brown bag covered copy of what else – Descent. I am sure we all guessed what was under that book cover but I am not sure we guessed Juliette would be masturbating on a chaise lounge in the middle of the day in a night-shirt. Maybe I am reading too far into it but I think that scene was so over the top. Is this show on the verge of jumping the shark?
THE DINNER PARTY
Take 2. But this time Audrey’s hair is in a bun (instead of down), Juliette is wearing a much more “conservative” dress… well maybe not conservative but she is not provocatively eating fruit. Mike is now sitting across from Audrey having the same discussion about the current sexual assault debate. The conversation gets heavy so Juliette politely excuses herself from the table to check on the souffle. This turns into a party in the kitchen. In the span of 3 minutes, we find out that Mike and Juliette are having a fling AND Audrey wants to f*#k Noah. WHO DOESN’T?
Upstairs Noah has found some quiet space because he is not used to being around people anymore. Okay, but weird at a dinner party to just go off to someone’s bedroom and read a book. Right? Juliette finds him and they share small talk. Here we find out that Juliette has a husband (a very famous medievalist who is suffering from terrible Dementia). Their little talk turns into the beginning of a session that ends before it begins. Noah runs out just like in his perspective.
HOT FOR TEACHER
Next thing we know, Professor Le Gall is being taken from behind by a stark naked Mike. She has taken her courtly love class to a whole new level. Juliette is clearly not into it, definitely imagining Noah. I am assuming she was still turned on from her earlier encounter and was just scratching an itch. A little later, she realizes Noah left his blazer and she finds his address in the pocket. UMMMM – I am not sure if you saw this BUT:
LIVINGSTON NJ, WHAT??? WHAT!!!
Being that I LIVE in Livingston NJ I can tell you a few things:
First and foremost – there is no street N. High Street. Second of all, there is no student housing unless I have been living under a rock for fifteen years. Third of all, Princeton is almost an HOUR away from Livingston, NJ. Fourth of all, there are over 10,000 towns in NJ. Either Princeton is not really the school they are showcasing (like is it Rutgers?) OR they didn’t want us to see that piece of paper. I am bewildered. Thoughts??
ANYHOW, Juliette takes it upon herself to return the blazer to Noah at 1:30am. Was she seriously going to have sex with him as well? Ew. Sloppy seconds.
Juliette finds Noah bleeding out on the floor. My big question in this scene is WHERE WERE THE POLICE?? How come they were not questioning her when the ambulance left to take Noah to the hospital? Don’t you think at a crime scene there would be officers interrogating her? Hmmmm.
PART TWO: NOAH
Noah, on the brink of death, has repeating flashbacks to his time spent in jail. John Gunther, the creepy guard, lets Noah in on this odd fact that they grew up in the same town and met at a swim meet back in ’85. He is super weird and gives me the feeling that he either has a thing for Noah or has it in for Noah.
Noah wakes up to an extremely annoying Helen asking a thousand questions about the stabbing. He is completely agitated, takes his hand away when she places it on his and is he is even more bothered that she still considers herself his wife. It’s really pathetic that she is this desperate. It makes me HATE her. Move on Helen…
Detectives arrive at Grey’s Anatomy to question Noah about who could have possibly done this to him? So there you have it, The Affair once again has become the “WHO DONE IT.”
- C0le Lockhart
- Alison Bailey
- Juliette Le Gall
Noah is released from the hospital (how long was he there – 1 day?) and goes to Juliette’s??? Really? They met literally two days ago, he got stabbed, (okay she saved his life), and now he is staying there??? Who is writing this plot? But wait, the best part is after almost bleeding out he has enough stamina to fully make out. I can’t.
After that ridiculous scene, Noah lays down and has a final flashback to Gunther giving him a 6 month present – a prison typewriter. He also tells Noah that he ordered his book, Descent. Will Gunther be masturbating to that as well? I sure hope that is not an upcoming scene. Noah signs a copy of his book for Gunther and shortly thereafter, Gunther sees a picture of Alison on the prison wall. Gunther, out of nowhere, is strict with prison rules and attacks Noah. Which is how we find out what happened to his shoulder.
Noah decides enough is enough and phones Inspector Gadget to let him in on who may just be the stabber……
UNTIL NEXT WEEK!!!
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